This week I was thinking of what to write about, last week I wrote about resting and taking time off social media so that you can find, define and clarify who you are, what your vision is and what your action plan is. You can read about here.
I wrote about how social media can be such a big distraction because sometimes we forget who we are because we get so busy looking at every other person and what they are doing. You can catch up on that post here.
This week, I planned to write about developing a daily personal development routine, as a follow up to my writings about personal growth, because success is found in the routine, it is found in the things that we do every day, in our habits but I’d be saving that conversation for my next post.
We all desire to be successful and to be able to live our dreams and that generally involves a whole lot of activities that we need to do.
Somewhere in the middle of that pursuit, we get blindsided and begin to forget some of the things that really matter. For example, when we define what it means to be rich or wealthy we often quantify it in terms of the money, accolades and all other material standards.
I subscribed to the daily minute with John C. Maxwell show, one of the topics was about building wealth, I was really excited like ‘show me the money’ , but I was really surprised by what I watched. It defined wealth differently, wealth not only inform of material acquisitions or position but wealth in terms of people.
Are we wealthy in relationships? Are our relationships rich? Are we rich in relationships?
A lot of times long the road, on the journey to living our dreams, maintaining our relationships might appear to be really difficult because we are much busier and we are doing legitimate things.
However, wealthy relationships and being wealthy in terms of relationships is also sometimes that we want to make a part of our mental frame when we start think of and pursue wealth.
A quote I read many years ago that I haven’t forgotten yet is that, ‘People are meant to be loved and things are supposed to be used’. For a good part of our journey, I have sometimes found myself doing the opposite using people and loving things or loving the goals I want to reach.
There are other popular sayings like, ‘Your network is your net worth’ and the importance of networking is really stressed. Sometimes I am concerned that a lot of times, the idea of networking is seen as meeting people with the intent to use them to meet our goals.
Networking is great but we shouldn’t be totally focused on what we can get from our relationship with others but the value that we bring to them also.
It is a popular narrative to find people unable to spend times with their family, friends and loved ones because of work. It wasn’t something I saw myself spiraling towards but I was.
A good part of this was also attributed to the fact that I am partly an introvert and I really enjoy spending time with myself a lot. There is also a balance to it also. A lot of times it is easy to reach out to people across from a computer screen or over social media but it’s also important to go out and spend time with people not just on the phone.
Our relationships are very important to who we become, some of our relationships can either pull us down or make us better. There is no controversy about the are people that we need to run from, people that steal and discourage us from our dreams. Those are people that we should run from, sometimes we stay too long in these company of these people because of emotional sentiments of a romantic relationship, a longtime friendship or family relations. If these relationships drain you, it’s advisable to try to draw away. The question is usually how do I do this? One of the things that I haven’t done perfectly is severing relationships the right way, try as much as possible when you close the door of a particular relationship not to slam it.
Sometimes the reason why we attract negative people, might be because we are also negative and this can be the very awful truth, but a lot of times we attract people like ourselves towards us mostly unconsciously. Sometimes what we need to do is work on ourselves.
The truth is that there are toxic people who would refuse to allow the relationship to fade quietly away, but you must resolve to make the right decision even though they may difficult My advice is that you get counsel from trusted and supported friends or mentors or how to go about this.
Not every relationship is a bad one. We should seek to surround ourselves with the right people. Sometimes the people around us would not come to us as readymade but we must be willing to take a chance on investing in people on being a people builder.
The underlying principle is not to get too focused on what we can get from people but also more on what we can bring to people. The value that we can bring to our relationships and the people around us.
Our biggest investment would not be in stocks, shares and bonds although they pay off. Our biggest investment would be in people. The people we have built, it is people that build multinationals and sustain it, not multinationals that make people.
Investing in people means that we would also make a personal commitment as individuals to be valuable people and to keep improving s that we can also bring that value to our relationships.
Also, as creatures of sight, we do a lot of judging, assessment and summarizing based on what we see about people in the present. People change, grow and evolve so don’t look down on people just because of what they seem to be like or are right now.
Remi Owadokun shared her story of being hosted to one of the most lavish in Uruguay on an influencer holiday that she wasn’t qualified for. The brand needed influencers with over 2 million followers but she only had less than 5000 followers, yet she was picked for the job because she had met the person in charge of picking out influencers several months ago and had gone the extra mile to be supportive of her even though they had only just met though there wasn’t exactly a possibility of them working together at the time. She more of the story here.
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